Read diary
33 Days after
A page in the diary "33 days after"
Written by SadinCanada January 18, 2010 20:33
I am female, recently celebrated my 38 birthday. I have a wonderful husband and currently in the final year of my undergraduate studies. Hard to believe, despite all the facade that I am living a healthy normal life, I am depressed. The very word that I denied since last year, only to take an action with seeing my doctor whom prescribed me with Cipralex. Starting with the low dosage, I must say...after 33days...I am feeling a little low this couple of days. After taking Cipralex, I am feeling better, not sad unnecessarily. Just last term, I failed 3 subject and my husband still doesn't know about it. I feel like I have failed him when everything in life is alreaedy in place and him just waiting for me to begin our life (buy a house, kids, etc etc...) but I can't seem to muster the courage to see the end of the tunnel for me. I have been in school, 4 years part time and last 2 years full time. So imagine that long 6 coming to 3 this year is just killing me. I lied to my husband as well. I usually go home after dropping him off at the GO station and went home straight away to sleep instead of going to school. I am older than the rest of my classmate therefore I always feel a little isolated. I am so sad, I was supposed to graduate this May but because I failed, my husband is going to kill me. I am tired all the time and all I want to do is sleep. Especially this time of the year, I will sleep 14-16 hours a day. I used to be such an active person but I don't know what happened to me. I hate Winter and sometimes I felt I shouldn't have left my home country at all. I just wish I can pause everything while I go to sleep or not wake up at all.
I live my life on a day to day basis and hopefully this meds will help me get through. I just need to paddle along.
Comments from the community